Is Your Child Rough on the Family Pet?

Up until two and a half years ago, when my son was born, our animals were running the asylum. We now have a dog, two cats, and our most recent addition is a guinea pig. They are as much a part of the family as our son, but our willful toddler doesn't always treat them with the same respect that they show him. It's not exactly his fault. It's more a matter of perspective.

Three of the most important facets of parenting are, communication, patience and vigilance, and these are three things to consider when trying to teach a child respect for animals.

Children require constant attention. When left to their own devices, they will find new games to play, such as pull the dog's tail or fur. Be vigilant and consistent in separating the child from the dog, and verbally explain that the dog doesn't like that type of treatment. Demonstrate by gently running your hands over the dog's fur, and saying, "Pet doggy nicely. He likes that."

If your child is too young to grasp the concept, sometimes facial expressions are needed. If this is necessary, drape yourself over the pet blocking the child from attacking it, make a sad face, and in a most pathetic voice, say, "No, no, please don't hurt doggy. Doggy doesn't like that. Won't you play nicely with doggy." This is a way of teaching empathy to your child. One aspect of discipline, is helping your child to understand another's point of view.

Children love the family's furry members, but they lack the understanding to show it properly. This leads to grabbing, pulling, slapping, and kicking, especially when a child expects the animal to play a game of chase or something, and the animal has other ideas.

Children typically don't want to hurt anyone, but they do enjoy the cause and affect response of a dog or cat jumping when it's hit or grabbed. If you can make it clear to your child that his or her actions are upsetting to the animal, he or she will likely feel bad about it, and try to make up for it by being nice or even saying sorry to the animal.

One reason children are hard on pets is they don't understand the boundaries. Make it clear to them what you expect. Verbalize the care they need to take with the dog or cat or whatever, and be firm and consistent. Shouting is not the answer, as a child will likely not understand what he or she is doing wrong. It may even exacerbate the situation, leading to more abrasive attacks.

Be clear on your expectations, and be vigilant in handing out conservative discipline in the way of calm separation. Stepping in between the child and animal, and directing the two to different areas of the room can be enough for a brief cool-down period--thirty seconds to a minute should be enough. It's not a punishment, just a redirection to re-enforce the rules.

If the incidents persist, keep at it. Communication, patience and vigilance are important factors. Also, take note of any triggers. Does your child hit the dog more frequently closer to naps or bedtimes? Is it a result of being tired and cranky? Take note of any such things to be avoided.

Animals can be a great part of the household, and a lot of fun for a child to grow up with. Make sure your child understands and respects the family pets, so everyone can be happy.